zen.org Communal Weblog

August 11, 2011

Just a little longer…

Filed under: — elana @ 21:44 IST

I read an article today, about some researchers who have had promising results by using HIV and genetically modified white blood cells to destroy cancer blasts. This is in treating Chronic Lymphoblastic Leukemia (CLL)…B had Acute Myeloid Leukemia (AML), but I could hope that at some point, this would work for all leuks.

And then I got angry.  Why now, 3 weeks later? Why not last year?  Or why didn’t his body fight it harder, to give him a little bit longer? To at least see Eoin start school?

No one has answers to these, which makes it all so much harder.

11 Comments »

  1. yeah, it always seems that they just find something just around the corner, it sucks. *hugs*

    Comment by Deirdre — August 11, 2011 @ 22:33 IST

  2. I guess these things take time, & that’s what is easy to run out of. Wish I could say something that helped. Sending good vibes your way.

    Comment by Roseanne — August 11, 2011 @ 22:39 IST

  3. Wish I could say something useful but I can understand your anger and only try to empathise.

    Comment by Jim redmond — August 11, 2011 @ 23:15 IST

  4. i think of you and the boys every day Elana, and “why” daily….i wish i had something to say that was remotely comforting…

    Comment by nancy — August 12, 2011 @ 18:12 IST

  5. “why is such a hard question” and so heartbreaking. it all seems horrendously unfair.much love

    Comment by diana barnes — August 12, 2011 @ 23:05 IST

  6. For folks like me who aren’t neighbours or on Twitter/Facebook/Google+ or whatever, I just wanted to say thanks for writing here again; it’s good to hear your news and it’s good to hear your energy again.

    Comment by Michael — August 13, 2011 @ 00:45 IST

  7. Many hugs…

    Comment by Laura — August 14, 2011 @ 22:48 IST

  8. It sucks. B fought hard and you fought hard with him. Thinking of you often and sending you love.

    Comment by Heidi — August 16, 2011 @ 05:05 IST

  9. Brendan will be there with Eoie on his first day of school and many other days, looking out for him and keeping him safe, all day long. M x

    Comment by Maria — August 16, 2011 @ 20:38 IST

  10. I was following your husband’s blog over the last several months, but hadn’t checked in recently since everything seemed to be going well. The last time I visited was early July, and everything seemed hopeful. That I’m shocked and saddened now is a gross understatement.

    I was involved in the early Internet, having started my own company in 1994 and operating the Simpsons Archive website since about then. Your husband’s book was an important guide to my associates and myself, and you don’t need me to say that he made a real impact on the world, a lasting one. Your boys have reason to be proud of him, and while it won’t fill the void that remains, I can see through your blog entries what strength of courage and character both of you have/have had. This time will come to us all one day and we never get to pick when. I pray that when my turn comes, I will be as strong as you and Brendan have been. It might be a bit strange to say, but as I try to see each person’s life as a story unfolding, I congratulate Brendan on a life story well written and full of meaning, even if it left us wanting more at the last chapter. Godspeed to you and your children. -Gary

    Comment by Gary Goldberg — August 16, 2011 @ 22:10 IST

  11. Elana, I was shocked and imensly saddened upon reading Brendan’s obituary published in the Islesboro Island News when I received the paper a week ago. Know I am holding you and Eoin abd Patrick in my thoughts and prayers. I was wondering why I didn’t see you or Lois and Terry this summer. I brought Megan and her boys, Karl and Clark up for 10 days in august and they were asking for you and the family. It’s been sobering reading this blog. Thank you for sharing your life here and offering support and knowledge. My dad died from leukemia years ago and this brings back many memories for me. I hope to see you in 2012. love David

    Comment by David Evelyn — October 16, 2011 @ 20:19 IST

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